Wall-E Movie Review: 7.5/10

Bottom-line: This is a guilty-pleasure film.

First of all, the movie beats you over the head with the fantastical, pillowy idea that infatuation leads to happiness. Simultaneously, it skillfully teases around the idea that unchecked, corporate irresponsibility will run Earth down into ecological catastrophe. Next it tickles your ribs aggressively with a bunch of obese, devolved humans and cutesy, servant robots. After this sneaky abuse, you probably won't notice the light bruising all over your entire body. Why won't you notice? Because everyone wants to laugh at ridiculous looking humans and adorable, pantomiming robots; and we also want to believe that we will find mutual infatuation with those that tickle our fancy most. The movie is an opium for the hopeless romantic inside each of us.

So, if you want a dark, gritty film... this isn't it. But if you're looking for a painkiller, this is genuine, pure crystal-meth. Nobody will call you a junkie--just don't blame me if you end-up in rehab.